Adjustment

Theres this ad I saw on TV. It was a great ad showing people adjusting like for instance asking people to move so that a guy can sit in a crowded train and showing lots of people adjusting to the situation with the motto saying that Thank god some things in life you don’t have to adjust like our brand of underwear. It was funny and its true there are lots of adjustment to be made. Like for instance India is making so many adjustment, against Pakistan, US and many countries. But the irony is that Indian people are adjusting more than the country because we are adjusting our Prime Minister. Isnt that funny.

But in life we have to adjust. Sometimes we do because of the circumstances and we have no choice and sometimes we bite the bullet and do it even though we have a choice but we do it cause we are the good guys or gals and think of others. But in order to pick the latter choice one has to let go of their ego. Thats the hardest part and unfortunately i am not immune to it. Still a long way for me to go on that path.

Credit card business is funny in India. Here they are promoting so much, like i would get atleast 4-5 calls in a day from bank asking me to take their loans or credit card. Sometimes those marketing guys are literally begging me to take their loans. That is ok but the after service in credit card sucks. I am not a big fan of credit card because of risk on the internet. But it has its advantages too, it atleast beats carrying all the cash around and pocketing the change one get. The banks in India are best. Atleast HSBC bank is best. I have credit card of HSBC Bank and its best because after using it and after 20 days i still dont get any statement. Many times they have not send me any statements that is why i think its best because one or two occasion they never charged me for the charges i did on my credit card. I must be the only one who would ask the bank is my account debited and have they charged me my visa. No dont think me as a noble person, I am doing it because i paid for the course and i want to make sure that money has been sent to the institute and that is why i m always asking have they charged me so that atleast i know that the money has been sent to the institute. Then the big battle would begin. The bank would then charge me extra for not paying my bills and then i would have to argue they never issued me the statement even though i was asking for that. Now here i am doing adjustment and i have no option because even if i have to order a book on amazon i need credit card.

Well life itself is adjustment and one has to adapt.

Indian politics down and dirty

I only know who Indias Prime Minister is, President and my states chief minister. Rest of the politicians are just name to me. Mostly and i do mean most of the time i really dont care whats going on around me as long as it is not effecting me. I have stopped reading newspaper because first theres too much negativity in it and i believe if i keep reading it then preety soon either i will be sleeping on the couch and looking at the ceiling of my shrinks office or any direful news wouldnt affect me in anyway. The best thing is to become ostrich and bury my head. I always have a passion for reading. In the doctors office ofcourse you have no choice but to read those old aging dying magazines they have and hope that you dont get an attack of asthma by picking the magazines. But suppose you go to a restaurant then obviously you would chat with your friends but i couldnt resist reading the menu even after ordering the stuff. I am reading because i like to read oblivious to the fact that i can understand it or not.

Like for instance i like reading about physics although i have taken commerce as my main stream of study and i know basic maths and statistics but no way those big alien language formulas you see in physics. I am still trying to understand quantum mechanics and after reading half of the article i give up because i gained as much knowledge from it as i had when i picked up that article. But still i like to read. My best time was when i was working in the mall at the furniture store. god that was blissful for me because i only had to attend customers when they came and it doesnt take a rocket scientist to conclude that you dont get that much rush in a furniture store compare to clothing store. So i would pile up 4-5 books and read and read and read until I hear someone calling for me and cursing myself not to notice the customer that came and asking me questions.

Where am i going with this? Look at the title and look at the tale i am spinning here. Politics everywhere is dirty and isnt confined only at national level. We hear words like office politics, corporate politics, politics among our friends and sometimes even in families. I think we should give new meaning to the word politics. It should be labeled as an infectious diseases to watch out for with mortality level of 99%. One should see indian politics and even in this era i get shocked by our politicians art work. In this field you need to be unethical with as much amount of morality that you can see through very powerful electronic microscope. Sometimes i feel for people sometimes i get angry at them. I feel because they have to suffer and get angry because even after experiencing first hand how they were chewed by our leaders still cheer for them. Democracy has a new meaning, do what you want. Freedom we say in more respected way. Its because of the works done by our leaders, they hyped up article by our media and seeing the suffering i gave up watching,reading or taking any interest in our politics. That is why you will find me the most ignorant person when it comes to politics. Let me think whos our Prime Minister. I know the name was on the tip of my tongue..............................

which world to live in during drinking

One way to escape reality for the time being is drinking. Another is going into meditation and third is dreaming when you are sleeping. Third one is not in our control. I am an occasional drinker and drink when occasion pleads me to do so. But whenever i drink i became more alert, usually its antithetic for others but here there is actually struggle going on in my mind. Its like I become more focused not to create a scene or not to say something which i am not supposed to say. Also one thing i have noticed is i become more polite and quiet when i am drinking. Now quiet i can understand as that is my nature. If some people like to yak yak and when they start drinking, god knows you would trade anything to get ear plugs or 3 days old smelly socks so that you can stuff that persons mouth.

So here I am drinking and getting high. Savoring those feelings but still cant let go all of my feelings or cant let myself drift into the wind. I actually try to control my actions which eventually dampens my high state of mind and which leads to nullify my objective for drinking. Its been 8 months since i have drank and i dont know but i dont feel like drinking at all. Even if occasion calls for, I still wouldnt drink. The idea in drinking is letting go and enjoying the waves but i cant seem to do that. Guess i am not cut out for drinking, what do you say?

To Be or Not To Be

Famous lines by Sir. William Shakespeare. Never thought I would using these lines. Now its funny that after doing some meditation and yogas, I gravitate myself towards spirituality. Theres a great book called "Sayings by Shri Ramkrishnan". Now its a great book to read and one should read atleast 2 pages daily. I was reading and progressing well until i came to a chapter where shri Ramkrishnan says that in order to gain samadhi one has to abdicate gold and women. Now gold its easy for me to renounce as i dont have much right now and women, sure I dont have that many lined up or waiting for me. But Shri Ramkrishnan said that we have to see every women as The Divine Mother.

Oops for past week I am trying to do that and believe me its not working even one bit. Perhaps i would look at women as divine mother but that feeling wouldnt last long more than 5 seconds. Also physiological point of view the thing you resist, the more it comes to you and more focus you give on it. If somebody says dont look over there, by reflex you will look over there and it takes a lot of presence of mind and self effort not to look over there.

Shri Ramkrishnan gave advice that once you will renounce the feeling, it will be stronger and will come to you more than before but you have to persist. He followed it up by an example. Now one part of me wants to give up women, for a week i was successful because for a week i didnt go out much and never came upon any good looking chicks. So it helped me in keeping my focus. But on weekend everything i worked out fell into shackles. One look at fair damsel (make that group of fair damsels) and there goes all my efforts. Now i enjoyed looking chicks more than ever, its like you want a candy and then your parents denied you that pleasure and finally after so much persistence you got it. Think how wonderful that feeling would be. I felt like that and top of it i never felt guilty that this is something i am not supposed to do. The thing is to accept that we are human and its natural for us to look at women. Now its up to
women to interpret what kind of looks I am giving her.

So here I am at the crossroads wondering which path should I take? Divine mother path or appreciation for beauty path.

Merging " I " into infinity

What i like about cats is that they hide whenever they get hurt or are dying unlike dogs who comes at you. I feel the same way. Many people when they are depressed or angry would like company in order to divert their focus from their problems. It is really a good idea but I dont feel comfortable with that. If i am angry then i dont want company cause i want to get my anger out and the poor guy whos giving me company willl have to face my wrath, neither i want them near me when i am depressed because i dont want to spoil their mood and i do feel guilty sulking and sitting there contributing nothing in their talks.

One other thing that annoys or infuriates me is to be aware but still not doing anything about it. Now most important thing is to be aware of your thoughts and emotions. They are the guiding system to your soul and body. If i am getting headache, my body is telling me that i am not aligning with my vibrations. The depressing thought is telling me that the more i am focusing on it, the more reality i am creating by keeping all my attention on that thought. Now i know that my thinking is creating new reality and ruining my present moment but i cant seem to stop it even though i am aware of my thoughts and its consequences. That my friends is the most infuriating thing you will ever come across.

The solution for that: Its easy, meditate, relax or do whatever that feels you happy. If you have pet, pat them and see how it brings smile on your face. Think of some funny incident and focus on that thought until u feel the feelings you had when you encountered that incident.

This other day only i was so angry and frustrated that i declined the offer to go out with my friend and have a cup of coffee. I wasnt in the mood for that and since i was angry i had to take it out. One cannot suppress it as it is more dangerous, those hidden emotions because then they go into your subconscious. So i had a shower which cooled me a little bit. Then i thought i will meet him outside for some chat so that it would be relaxing for me. I called him and he said we will meet when one other friend who at the moment is not in the town will come. So i said ok and there my ego came. I do whatever he wants and when he wants and when i need him he says no. Then he called and i was thinking whether i should accept the counter offer because i thought he might have known how i was feeling and was probably trying to cheer me up. He called to say lets go to the movies and my temper shot up. I said i wasnt in the mood and hanged up. Now for a week i am not going to meet him. The reason behind this is my ego. I understand it completely, being aware of it but its hard to change it or amend it. I have read many sayings of great people and they are asking us to be like a salt doll who when dropped in the ocean will dissolve and become one with the ocean. It will lose its individuality and existence and will become one same as dropping my ego and "I" i will become one with the universe.


Well it may happen but its not gonna happen this week as i m going to be true to my word by shunning out my friend. Lets see if it happens or not but this article is the best way of saying how not to do things. cheers

In search of God

Is there God or not? This argument is ceaseless. To me it all depends on your faith and belief. I got inspiration of this topic from a article i came upon. It had a joke where a customer goes into a barber shop and barber says that there is no god as if there would be then there wouldn't be any sick, dying people in the world. After the customer gets its hair done he sees a beggar outside with big matted hair and long beard and turns to the barber.

" You say there is no god and i say there is no barber"

"How can you say that? I am right in front of you"

"Well if there was barber then how come all the beggars have long hair and unshaved beard"

"In order to get their haircut done they have to come to me"

"Exactly, in order to see god you have to go to them"

Many many people would argue on this and just like the universe is made of matter and anti-matter, everything have two sides. Good and bad, light and dark, positive and negative are all part of our nature and all are equal. We have to learn to accept them instead of shunning out bad and seeking for good. How would we know what is good unless we have tasted the fruits of bad? How would we know what is light when we have never experienced darkness? Everybody has in their nature, inclination to see the cup half full or half empty. Now this is the kind of impulse you dont have your control over. Its natural for you but not enduring. You can change your view how you look at the situations, things that you encounter in your life. Some people are born skeptical and would argue until the end of this world. Sometimes i get frustrated because these are the people even though you convince them of your point instead of realising and understand the point, at the back of their mind they are thinking of the way to find another loophole in the logic, finding another way to prove that the game is still on. Now i just let it go and seriously sometimes get sympathetic as they are stuck in the spiteful vicious circle for which they only hold the key and they have to be aware to realise it.

A german guy once asked my Kriya Yoga Guru to prove that there is god. My guru asked him to prove that there is no god as he wants the proof. Now if we dont see doesnt mean that its not there. We dont see air but we feel it, we havent seen black hole but we know they do exist. Sri Ramkrishna very well said

"You see many stars in the sky at night, but not when the sun rises. Can you therefore say that there are no stars in the heavens during the day? O man, because you cannot find god in the days of your ignorance, say not that there is no god."

Just as we feel the air but cannot see it, when you invite god in your soul you would surely feel his presence. The key is to be open minded, to reach him just like the joke of barber and customer. Now I am just expressing my opinion and i am found the way to reach my god. The way has been shown to me, all i have to do is to start walking.

Let me ask you something. What would you say if i ask what do you think of our world? Most of them would say world is in dire, polluted ete cetra. We always say there is so much poverty and bad in this world, when did we say the world is so beautiful, it is so good and breathtaking? If you focus on problems instead of solutions, according to the law of attraction you will get and see poverty and suffering only. Lets not underline the problems why are we seeing the cup half empty?